I think some of my old lyrics were really pretty good. (And contrarily, some of them were equally corny and lame)
It's interesting that i appreciate these things as much now as i did then, if not more.


( Cut to save space )

Caninesixtynine - Wishes for Summer


I wrote/composed this in 2001, so it's... ... ...quite old.* But i figured i'd stick it here, since i uploaded it to show to someone anyway. Obviously it's overwhelmingly imperfect, especially the vocals... but i've always thought as far as potential, this composition has a lot.
It was written about my girlfriend then, even though she is not the type of person who deserves songs written in her honour... but i didn't know any better at the time.


* I think at one point (probably 2004 or so?) I touched the song up a little bit... which is probably why the vocals are better than the other stuff from that era, even though they are still awful.




hell is cold. hell is snow...
winter turns to summer when i'm with you.
steam will rise. steam will rise...
under the blue of your supernova eyes.

...at least it seams to be
something factually fine
like hell, winter is a state of mind.
'cuz you are my sunshine.

(like hell. like hell. like hell... inside.)


descend into my world: descend into the cold.
winter is really nothing when summer is a girl.

Persephone come home... Persephone return to me.
Persephone come home... Persephone return to me.

descend into my world: descend into the cold.
winter is really nothing when you are in the world.


hell is cold. hell is snow...
winter turns to summer when i'm with you.
the cricket chirps. and the junebug sings...
these are the sounds that my summer brings.

...if one seeks to see
then one will find
like hell, winter is a state of mind.
'cuz you are my sunshine.

(like hell. like hell. like hell... inside.)

Redlining my own sketch...
It helps sometimes to get an idea of how something might look with some changes... without having to redo or erase any physical work.


Sphinxes! my newest obsession. They are so cool...

Hey Livejournal!


...

Facebook is lousy for blogging. So i dunno, maybe i'll use this old thing... Occasionally i feel like flapping my lips all over this keyboard to express myself but i haven't really had an outlet for that since i stopped bothering to come here.

Anyway... Drawing. Been up all day doing that... my back is sore but i still feel awake, mentally!

On a lighter note -



I've pretty much settled in down here, and things are going fairly well. It's nicer than Niagara Falls :P The people here are not dead inside, and some of them have funny accents too!

(Nahani, consider this a reply to your text, since i forgot to do that :P)

Doing art and shit. Fighting distraction ...er... trying to balance distraction, that's a better way of putting it.
Doing commissions is fast money... i made like $350 in a few hours. Of course, now i have to do the art that those people paid for, and that will take more than a few hours... But i can handle it. It will take a lot less time than standing behind a convenience store counter for 40 hours a week, that's for sure!

Soon it'll be time for EF... it's *looks* whoah, the 20th o.o ...so i'll be heading to the airport in 9 days. I managed to get my tickets bought, the only piece of travel i have left to take care of is getting a bus ticket from Charlottesville to DC; Dulles Airport. That won't be too hard.

Got to prep some more art though...

I ran out of time for my Sine costume, sadly. So i'll just be repairing my oryx and bringing that. Ah well, keeping it simple and all that jazz.

I need to call my dad one of these days too, i'm really bad at keeping in touch.

*eats naan*

Oh, and hey corin91, how much will it cost to ship that stack of shirts down here?

Last day of work tonight, heading out in a few minutes.
I'm not going to wear a uniform, and i don't really plan to spend much time on chores. I mopped the floor last night... it will survive. I'm done!
Hopefully i can come close to finishing this picture.

I kind of wish i had a non-FA gallery online, because the people who always stop in and look at what i'm working on while i'm there aren't going to be able to do that anymore. There are a few folks who are genuinely interested! Which is cool. Maybe i'll give them my URL anyway, even though my site just has links to FA and stuff.


I really want to get into radio... shortwave radio stuff is incredibly interesting to me, but i know very little about it and the hardware involved... Just tidbits that attract me like magnets. Oh the sampling and sound collage i could do!

Last night i finally got around to moving a bunch of crap around onto my external storage drive so that i could free up a little space on my main HDD... I've been wanting to do that for quite a long time.
Why?
Well...
Before i left for work i set my computer to defrag the disk. It hasn't been able to do that in like... two years at least. :O Never enough space. But woo, i came home in the morning and it had succeeded! And the computer wasn't even reduced to a pile of ashes under my desk. So that's good.

I'm slightly nervous about having some of that stuff in only one location (deleted it on my main drive once i put it on the external disk) ...because if that thing died i would lose a lot. Art stuff and music stuff. My life, basically. :-/
Someday i need to buy some hardware and set up a RAID so i don't have to worry about manually backing stuff up anymore. Doing it this way isn't very efficient, nor is it comprehensive. I know if i lost one of my drives there would be things i'd overlooked and forgotten to copy, etc.

I was actually surprised that the art stuff that i was moving (PSDs mostly) took up a lot more space than the audio stuff (WAVs)
But i guess i shouldn't be... i had a lot of versions of the same things from the colouring process, because i usually save 3 or 4 different files (so that i'm not writing over the one immediately before the one i'm currently working on, just in case i fuck up) Those PSDs tend to be around 100Mb each, so yeah. Adds up fast o.o

...

Trying to corral a bunch of stuff to pile into my car today to bring to store in the barn when i visit my mom in the evening... stuff i don't plan on taking with me but that i don't want to throw away. ...i know there will be multiple carloads of it, but i figure since i'm going there anyway i might as well bring some today.
? Did you know: 'Like herding cats' is also an expression that can be applied to inanimate objects. This stuff is being difficult :P

They're having a sort of going-away get-together at my mom's house. I'll probably be a zombie by then, but ah well. It'll be good to see family peoples.

Mooving.

I think i'm going to just take my car and everything i can fit in it, and leave the rest of my stuff in my folks' barn for safe keeping for the time being. I'll save like $250 not having to fuel up the van... And with the plane tickets to Deutscheland that i still need to buy i need all the extra money i can get. Not to mention having to pay bills once i move... Having at least a small wallet-cushion is nice.

I think my brother really wanted to go (he was going to drive the van) judging by how he didn't hesitate to say yes when i asked. I'm not sure why... maybe just to get away from the mundaneity for a couple days... Maybe he still feels guilty from back in the day when he stole money from me... i dunno. I kinda wanted him to come - i guess a brother bonding thing. But eh... money is tight.

I won't be able to fit much in my car... just the essentials...
*lists*
-drafting table and futon can be strapped to the roof
-trunk full of costume stuff
-oryx head/body
-skull
-computer (minus CRT monitor, going to leave that behind since i need a new one anyway)
-crappy small lcd monitor for temporary use + laptop
-box(es) of art and mat stuff
-two suitcases of clothes
-blankets/consolidated bag of plushies
-various music things (theremin, box of mics/cables, amp, guitar, mixer, maybe one keyboard if i have room)
-printer/scanner
-cds
-wooden cube*
-a few smaller boxes of odds and ends
-backpack
-box of tea and whatever small amount of food and kitchen stuff i have
-audio rack if i have room (otherwise just take out mic pre-amp and leave the rest)
-speakers and receiver if i have room


I think i can do it. That is a big list, but i am a car-tetris master.
I'll have to get a few things once i'm there anyway... like
-a chair to sit in
-a better CRT monitor (maybe a nice big one!)
-pillows to nest in
-things i am forgetting


*this is super important, lol.



Pizza is waiting, brb!

Stuff i'm working on. Well, at least the first one is currently being [slowly] worked on... the other one i will get back to at some point. Another artist is doing a digital painting using that sketch/arrangement as a base to sell as a collaboration at Eurofurence. I'm looking forward to seeing how that turns out!
( Images behind cut for size )

Anyway, my LJ is not dead :D You are privy to arts that i have not officially put up yet.
I couldn't sleep. But at least my headache went away. ...my room is a huge mess. It's like it exploded everywhere. But secretly - the mess is a giant conglomeration of organized piles that i am sorting through. It isn't as bad as it looks. :P
Only 5 more nights of work...

Now that my headache is gone i feel REALLY hungry. *doubles over* Maybe pizza...

( Goodbye old pal... hello new car payment )

Well there's one thing taken care of. Buh... tiiired ;_;
Need dinner, some huskie-time, and then sleep. Maybe it will cool off a bit tonight... i hope, aaugh.

When i was cleaning out my old car i found some cds under the papers on the passenger seat... Saw my bro today and gave him a chocolate okapi cd. I wonder if he'll dig the jungle thump :>


*drips sweat*

So i began this entry by typing not here, but in the 'tags' box. I entered 'life shit'. It's the tag i use for like... well, life shit. - Stuff happening. ...It often has to do with transitions; where i was, where i am, and where i'm going.

I've returned from AC, and now it's time to get moving - onto the next stage.
In this case the transition is a physical one as well - i've decided i'm going to be moving to Virginia at the end of July, or maybe the first few days of august.
I'll be sharing a house with two friends, and hopefully sharing art and creativity too.
The two years i've lived where i am now haven't been bad, and i learned a very important thing that i'd been hoping to figure out about myself...
Basically, i want to be an artist... i want to create. I guess part of me has always known this - afterall, it's what i've always done, and it's the thing that gives me the most happiness in life. But i wondered for a while if maybe i'd rather be an animal person, like... caring for a farms' worth of critters and all that stuff.
One cannot do both, and i have decided i definitely prefer art over caretaking. I've never wanted kids, and having animals isn't really any different than that. I don't want to be tied down by obligations and lives that depend on me. I just want to live and create. :3

In 2006 when i moved to New York i failed miserably... from the moment i arrived i felt depressed, overwhelmed, and beaten down by the weight of that rotten, wormy city. (Niagara Falls is dead... don't go there unless you're just passing through. There is no soul in that place, only vampiric emptiness that will bleed you dry...)
I don't know what waits in Waynesboro, but i'm hoping it will be better. How could it be worse? I've got a lot more experience now, too. So i'm really hopeful that i can succeed.
Not very confident... but a little hopeful. That's better than nothing!


AC brought a surprise too, i guess when i am down there i will have companionship... Someone not too far away whom i'll be able to spend time with and curl up with and fill the need i've had forever for physical and emotional closeness...
I don't know what to expect with that either, but i am hopeful too. Not very confident... but a little hopeful. :P (That's a theme apparently.)
My dog <3<3 ...we'll see how things go, ok? *nuzzles*



So yeah... big changes. And a month after that I'll be going to Germany for EF... i was worried i wouldn't be able to buy the plane tickets i still need... but now After sales at AC went really well i think i'll be okay.

The odyssey of ECMajor... we all have our own journey, and while mine would probably be pretty boring to anyone reading a biography... it is mine. It's full of fear at times... but it's full of hope and anticipation too.

Life is pointless and futile; a long, arduous climb to the lip of the volcano that we'll inevitably be pushed off of into free-fall and into oblivion. Life for each of us is a personal struggle that will be lost in time by the ever-turning world when we die, insignificant and alone. Everything we accomplish is worthless. BUT... that doesn't mean we shouldn't live it and enjoy the scenery during the hike up to the volcano's summit. :3

Lots of matting...

( Cut for image size )
...but the result is worth the work :D Hopefully people will buy this stuff.


Gonna be leaving in the early afternoon tomorrow... still have to do a few things, and pack, but i think i'll actually have time for sleep too... which might be a first in all my years of last-minute con preparations, hah.

Here, this caught my eye as particularly idiotic, so i thought i'd share:
Conservatives call for Ground Zero mosque protest

...So, they think it is disrespectful to build a building that contains a mosque somewhere near the WTC site. I guess because Islam is dirty or something and it will sully the memories of the people who died there on 9/11.
(Can you even build something in Manhattan and not have it be near the WTC site?)
And yes, the building is actually "a 13-story community center including a mosque, performing art center, gym, swimming pool and other public spaces." It's not like... a big old mosque. Not really.
Yeah. It sure sounds like the explosive-strapped jihadi heart of darkness to me! -.-
...Or maybe just conservative ignorance and hate in action. That sounds more likely. *nods*

I wonder just how many churches are near the WTC site anyway?


"We feel it would be more appropriate maybe to build a center dedicated to expunging the Koranic texts of the violent ideology that inspired jihad, or perhaps a center to the victims of hundreds of millions of years of jihadi wars, land enslavements, cultural annihilations and mass slaughter," - Pamela Geller

I didn't know that they were killing for Allah alongside the dinosaurs. :D Learn something new every day. MAYBE THE DINOSAURS WERE ISLAMIC EXTREMISTS. Maybe that is why bible-humping creationists want to pretend they didn't exist. omg.


Anyway... people are awesome.

aka: HOLY SHIT THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME



My .3mm pencil ran out of lead last night, and i was bummed out. It was such a perfect night to finish the picture i'm working on... since it's a holiday and the morning hours were even more dead than sunday. Maybe i can finish it now...
*refills pencil*